For my special guy, we took the day to pamper ourselves.  Decadent breakfast, [...]]]> For those of you late to the party, today is Valentine’s Day.  It is a day of love, a day of intimacy, and a day for sharing your kinky side with your special person:)  What did my day entail?  So glad you asked.

For my special guy, we took the day to pamper ourselves.  Decadent breakfast, consisting of eggs, a side of fruit, fresh squeezed juice, and cafe’ au lait (I usually drink my coffee black, but a special day calls for special coffee).  Since Valentine’s Day is a day to show your softer side, I put away the kinky toys, and we just enjoyed each other sensually–we fed each other, explored each other, and luxuriated in each other.  While most days, we get off trying to show each other just who dominates who, today there was a cease fire–and we simply enjoyed each other’s company, each other’s love, and each others naked, glorious bodies. 

Today served as a special reminder.  Pain, denial, teasing–all of these things that hurt so much and at the same time deliver exquisite ecstacy, are always at their best when they are contrasted with their opposites (pleasure, release, giving).  Just the way that we often don’t see the good things in life until they are taken away, we cannot appreciate the euphoria that denial can bring unless we know the joy of indulgence.  Too much of anything can become routine–and sex should never be routine, when it can so easily be ecstatic.  How can it be ecstatic?  By exploring the depths of it from all angles.  By accepting the good as well as the bad.  By experimenting with pleasure as well as the agony.  By allowing ourselves to feel pride in ourselves, as well as extreme humility.  In short, by mixing it up.  Of course we all have natural inclinations, and it’s a wonderful thing to accept who you naturally are.  But experimenting with those things which you aren’t used to, by getting to know our opposites, we can appreciate who we naturally are all the more.

Afterall, what is denial when release doesn’t exist?  What is pain if you don’t know pleasure?  What is humility if you’ve never been cocky?  It’s nothing at all.  It’s routine.  It’s without feeling.  It’s drudgery. 

So I urge you on this Valentine’s Day to make the world your Valentine.  See it through fresh eyes.  Explore it–and explore yourself.  We cannot be afraid to mix it up and see the world from a different perspective–because if we don’t, we won’t see it at all.

Cruel to be kind,

Empress Whitney

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